Sunday, August 31, 2008

Finding Love in the Small Things

This evening after the sun went down, Chris, myself, and Aleeyah with her baby stroller and baby in tow headed out for a walk around the complex where we live. We laughed as Aleeyah kept referring to her baby as "baby sister" (and no, this blog will not be about if or when Aleeyah might get a baby sister (: ) . She kept labeling us all. Like she was trying to remember for herself who everyone was. It was rather funny. Chris got smacked in the heels a few times by the crazy 3 year old with a pink stroller. We decided that Aleeyah just isn't ready to be a mommy after viewing her in mommy mode. Other than occasionally running her baby's stroller up her father's heels, she kept picking up and slamming down her stroller when she got stuck. She drove the stroller around like someone you would see driving in a Wal-Mart parking lot with their eyes on that one parking space that says, "You won't have to get a bit of exercise if you park here!". She did the same move her dad did when he let go of the Aleeyah's stroller at the zoo and landed us in the ER. She even almost forgot her "baby sister" and left her behind as we were frog chasing.

Even though the stroller ended up being just as we expected--an adventure all on it's own, I would do it again in a heart beat. Why? Not because of the laughs we all shared together watching Aleeyah bounce her poor baby around that she claimed was her baby sister, but because her hands were glued to the handles and most of her attention was on her baby. She didn't ask to be held or to ride on daddy's shoulders. She wasn't grabbing hold of my finger and telling me to "Come here". She didn't hold Chris and I's hands as she swung back and forth yelling "Whhhheeeeee!" And in all that time,

I got to hold my husband's hand.

I love all those times that I mentioned with Aleeyah-the shoulders, the calls to come here, all the Wheeeees, but to hold my husband's hand as we watched our little baby perform her big girl routine, was wonderful.

If you are a parent, you understand that maintaining a intimate relationship with your spouse is important, but so often it gets put on the back burner until you get a chance to come back to it. There are diapers to change, teeth to brush, milk to make, and bathes to give right now. They can't wait. Your hands are always busy doing the your mommy/daddy duties and pleasures. Your thoughts are wrapped around what your child is doing right now and what they will be doing 30 years from now. Your feet are chasing after your precious kids as they are one step from hurting themselves or getting into something that you know will take you hours to clean up. Your heart is wrapped around their every tear....every laugh....every smile....every word....every move....every fear. Your heart is wrapped around their heart as if to protect every part of their being. How do we have time for anything else? Our relationships with our spouse turn cold on the back burner and becomes that one pot on the stove that we can never find the time to scrub.

What can we do? Although I feel I struggle with this daily, I think for me, I've realized it's a matter of how I look at my husband and our marriage within our family in our every day lives. I don't always need time alone to remember how it feels to be married. I don't always need to go on that romantic dinner to feel the romance.

I've realized it's the little things that we do daily that I find our bond of love.

I love just spending time watching Chris and Aleeyah play. I love it when the 3 of us go for walks. I love spending time in the car chatting to and from the grocery store. I love helping him with his homework. I love looking at him with eyes that says, I am yours and we are His. I love being unified with him-one flesh, one body. And my greatest joy in our marriage comes from being parents. Parents that love being together and that love raising a strong little girl. Strong in spirit, strong in hope, strong in kindness, strong in mind, and strong in love.

Is it always easy? No. Is it worth it? YES

I'll be honest with you, I've missed my husband's hands lately. I've missed feeling it in mine. As Aleeyah is getting older and finding her independence, we are finding new ways to focus on each other, but we've also have had a lot of changes in our lives lately--good changes, but changes nonetheless. We've been busy adapting to a new home, new state, new job, new school, but where busyness hits the home, satan always tries to creep his way in.

In our home, there will be no room for him! Please be praying for us and remember that the biggest gifts and joys in your marriage, in your family, and in your walk with God come in small packages daily.

Have a great Labor Day weekend and don't forget to hold your spouse's hands. It might mean more than you know!

Tonight's prayer power will be for marriages. Not just ours, but for the marriages of our friends, our family, and our blog reader's marriages. I'm not normally a blanket prayer for everybody in the world's marriage kind of gal, but I'll talk to God about that one too!

1 comment:

Jill Foley said...

Beautiful...thanks for sharing. Speaking of marriages...I read an awesome book this year by Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs..."Love and Respect". It's a great book you might want to put on your list. It helped us get through an extremely rough time this past year as we quit jobs and moved.

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